Secret
by othersideofdown
Summary: "Everyone has a secret, but can they keep it, oh no they can't." Everyone has their own secret. How long can they keep it for? Smut in second chapter. Jarlos.
1. Part 1

Secret

* * *

"Carlos!" The Latino in question looked up to see his friends Kendall and Logan looking down at him. Kendall was the one who had spoken. "Are you okay dude?"

"Yeah," Carlos said. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You were fidgeting in your sleep," Logan said. "James woke up and noticed, so he got us."

"You got him up?" James asked, rushing into the room, a bucket half-filled with water in his hand. He was wearing nothing but sweatpants and his hair was disheveled, like he had just gotten out of bed. "Thank God!" He put the bucket down and walked over to where his friends were. "Are you okay Carlos?"

"Yeah," Carlos said again. "I'm fine. Probably just a bad dream."

"You seriously freaked me out man," James told him.

"Are you sure that's all the was Carlos?" Logan asked. "A bad dream?"

"Pretty sure," Carlos added. Although he was lying. Everyone else quickly nodded and parted ways, going back to bed. That left Carlos lying awake.

Carlos stood up and lifted the bucket of water of the floor and he made his way to the kitchen, dumping it out into the sink. James was actually going to throw it at him? At least it wasn't boiling or freezing, that would have been a bad situation on top of the one they had. Carlos walked back into the room he shared with James, a smile playing at his lips as he saw the tall brunette asleep on his bed. His head was thrown back on the pillow and the sheets were thrown haphazardly across the bed. He had such a childlike appearance when he was asleep that made Carlos want to stop and stare at him for as long as possible. Carlos didn't have a nightmare, or any bad dream for that matter. The main focal point of his dream was the object of his affection. What frightened him the most was that the object of his affection was ladies' man James Diamond. Carlos didn't know what to think at first, but as time progressed, he realized that he was in love with James, and couldn't do anything about it. He, Carlos Garcia, was in love with James Diamond.

That was why it hurt Carlos to see James flirt with multiple girls, trying to gain their attention. He had a reputation to uphold however, he was in fact the pretty boy, the "face", of Big Time Rush, as he liked to call himself. Carlos desperately wished he could tell someone, but he was afraid of the judgement that would come his way. He didn't want James to hate him, he didn't want Kendall or Logan to hate him, he didn't want anyone to hate him for that matter. Everything would have been so much simpler in Minnesota, no paparazzi, no pressure, no anything that would prevent Carlos from making a total fool of himself. He was grateful for the opportunity he had, but it made everything so complex that Carlos didn't even understand it sometimes. He let out a sigh as he went back to his bed, resuming his earlier position of just staring up at the ceiling.

"I love you James," Carlos whispered to himself before turning to his side, his back facing James as he fell asleep.

* * *

Carlos swore that his friends were acting pretty strange the next morning when he walked out of his shared room with James.

"Hey Carlos," Kendall said.

"Hey Kendall, hey Logan," Carlos replied. "James in the bathroom?"

"Yep," Logan said. "Not much of a surprise is it?"

"Not really," Carlos laughed.

"Are you okay Carlos?" Logan asked.

"What are you talking about?" Carlos asked.

"Yesterday wasn't normal for you dude," Kendall said. "If there was anything wrong you'd tell us. Right?"

"Of course," Carlos told them. "You're my best friends."

"Hey all!" they heard James say. "How about we all go to the pool today? We actually have a day off!"

"Good idea James!" Kendall said.

"To the pool!" Logan added. The four started to walk when Kendall grabbed Carlos's arm, pulling him back.

"We'll meet you down there James," Kendall said. "Logan, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Yeah," Logan said, walking back.

"What's the big deal guys?" Carlos asked after James left.

"You like someone don't you?" Kendall asked.

"What are you talking about?" Carlos asked.

"You only act like this when you like someone " Logan added. "Who's the lucky girl?"

"The thing is," Carlos said. "I don't like a girl." He bit his lip, waiting for a response.

"We aren't gonna yell at you Carlos," Kendall said.

"We want you to be happy dude," Logan added. "If you like a guy, then we won't judge you."

"Really?" Carlos asked.

"Really," Kendall said. "Now let's head down to the pool."

* * *

If Carlos hadn't hated his life before, he was sure the sight in front of him made him hate it with an even deeper passion. James was flirting with Sun Block Girl as he rubbing the sunscreen on her back, her giggling getting on his nerves. Carlos sighed as he stood up, walking away from the pool and to the lobby. He moved away from the elevators and opted for the stairs, finding the way much faster. He made his way to the apartment, slamming the door shut behind him.

"Carlos!" he heard Logan shout from behind him as the apartment door shut for the second time. "What's wrong?"

Kendall walked over to him and put his hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down. "There's something you're not telling us, and we need to know what it is."

"Nothing's wrong! Just drop it!"

"Then stop lying to us!" Logan said.

"You wanna know who I like?" Carlos asked, trying to keep his voice calm. "I'm in love with James alright? I can't take it anymore!"

"What?" Carlos's eyes went wide as he turned to see James standing by the now open door. "Kendall, Logan, can you leave so Carlos and I can talk?"

The two mentioned nodded before walking out of room, shutting the door behind them.

"Please don't hate me!" Carlos begged.

"Carlos-" James tried, walking over to him.

"I-I can change! Just don't hate me!"

"Carlos!" James said, grabbing onto Carlos's arms, forcing him to stop moving.

"Just don't," Carlos said, his voice growing faint as he tried to avoid James's gaze.

James quickly wrapped one arm around Carlos's waist, his free hand moving to cup Carlos's face as he brought their lips together. Carlos's eyes flooded with shock before he relaxed into it, wrapping his arms around James's neck.

"You love me?" James asked after pulling away, pressing their foreheads together. He kept his hand on Carlos's cheek, smiling softly. "You're really in love with me?"

"Yeah," Carlos said. "I really do. I have for a long time."

"Do you know how long I've wanted to hear you say that?"

"What? Really? What about all of those girls-"

"I've been trying to distract my feelings for you, but it never worked."

"So you love me too?" Carlos asked, not wanting it to be a dream.

"Yes," James told him, pulling him closer. "I'm in love with you Carlos, and I can assure you that nothing will change that." 


	2. Part 2

Secret

* * *

It had been two years. Two years since Big Time Rush had become a big hit. Two years since Kendall, James, Carlos, and Logan made it in the music industry. Two years since James and Carlos had confessed their love for each other, their passion growing stronger with each passing day. After two years, Big Time Rush had come to an end, but they were still popular, although they no longer made music or went on tour. Kendall went back on his goal of playing professional hockey, while Logan decided to work on becoming a doctor. James stayed in Hollywood, still keeping his fame while Carlos decided to become a stuntman, also so the two could stay together. The four stayed in close contact and met every once and a while, not letting their friendship fade. James and Carlos had further developed their love, all the while trying to keep their relationship out of the public eyes. That was what the two were doing know, trying to enjoy themselves as best they could.

"James!" Carlos laughed, trying to evade his boyfriend's playful attack. "Stop it!"

"Stop running Carlos!" James said, chasing after him.

"Give it up!" Carlos said.

"I don't think so!" James replied, jumping at Carlos, wrapping his arms around his waist as they both fell onto their shared bed.

"Let me go!" Carlos said, trying to squirm away.

"Not happening!" James replied with a laugh. He turned so that he was hovering over Carlos, his arms still wrapped around his waist. He chuckled lightly as he pressed their foreheads together. "I win."

"Not fair!" Carlos said. "You cheated!"

"How so?" James asked, raising an eyebrow in questioning. "Come on Carlos, tell me how."

"Um..." Carlos thought.

"I thought so," James said jokingly.

"Just because I can't think of a reason doesn't mean you didn't," Carlos protested.

"Yes it does," James replied.

"Just stop," Carlos told him.

"Only because you want me too," James said, sitting up and pulling Carlos into his lap. Carlos wrapped his arms around James's neck and he bent down, their lips meeting. James tightened his grip on Carlos's waist, keeping him close. "You're gorgeous, do you know that?" James asked after pulling away.

"Me? Gorgeous?" Carlos asked, running a hand through James's hair. "What about you?"

"Don't count yourself out Carlitos," James told him. Carlos smiled as he brought their lips together again, weaving both his fingers through James's hair. James pulled his lips away and dragged them across Carlos's cheek, trailing them down his neck and biting at his pulse point.

"J-James!" Carlos groaned. "I-I need you."

James quickly pulled off, looking at Carlos with shock in his eyes. "Are you sure Carlos?"

"Yeah," Carlos replied. "I'm sure. I'm a little nervous, but I'm sure." He got off of James's lap and sat back down on the bed, unweaving his fingers from James's hair.

"Just let me know when you want me to stop," James said.

"I will," Carlos told him. James put his hand on Carlos's shoulder and gently pushed him back so he was lying on the comforter. Carlos gave him a soft smile before pulling James's shirt up and over his head, tossing it to the side. James undid the buttons of Carlos's shirt and Carlos sat up, allowing James to slide it off his shoulders. He rested back on the bed, throwing his head back on the pillow as James began tweaking his nipples, soft moans escaping from his parted lips.

"How does this feel?" James asked.

"Good," Carlos groaned. "R-really good."

James nodded, then brought his lips back to Carlos's neck, sucking on the mark he made earlier. He trailed them down his neck, capturing a nipple while tweaking the other with his fingers. Carlos arched his back and let out a soft cry of pleasure. James then proceeded to do the same to the other before kissing down Carlos's chest, stopping at the hem of his jeans.

"Keep going," Carlos told him, noticing him stop. James undid the button of his jeans and pulled them off his legs, placing a hand on the strain of Carlos's boxers. Carlos moaned and bucked his hips, desperate for the friction. James gently crushed their lips together, licking at the seam of Carlos's lips as he cupped Carlos's bulge. Carlos moaned at both the feeling of James's hand and James's tongue mapping out his mouth. James gently pulled away and he undid the button of his jeans, pushing them off his legs. He straddled Carlos and began rolling his hips, their clothed erections brushing against each other.

Carlos weaved his fingers through James's hair as he brought him down for another kiss, his lips instantly parting at the contact. Carlos met James's hips with his own, his head falling back onto the pillow. James chuckled lightly before pulling off, sneaking his hand beneath Carlos's boxers and grabbing his length. He started to alternate between stroking and squeezing, Carlos's mind heavy with pleasure. James yanked Carlos's boxers off his legs and Carlos gasped at the feeling of cold air on his typically shielded skin.

"You okay?" James asked, pulling his own boxers off.

"I'm okay," Carlos told him. "Don't worry. You can keep going." When James looked up, his eyes held uncertainty. Carlos noticed this and pulled him in for another kiss. "I'm alright," he told him. "Honest. I told you I'd let you know when I wanted you to stop, and I haven't said anything yet."

"I don't want to hurt you Carlos," James said. "I wouldn't forgive myself if I hurt you."

"James, look at me. It always would have hurt, I know that. But I want it to be with you. Not anyone else, _you_. Please. I want this. I promise you that I want this." James gave Carlos another quick kiss before

James nodded before placing his hands on the inside of the Latino's thighs, gently pulling them apart. He brought his hand to his mouth and began to suck on two of his fingers, Carlos watching in anticipation. James took his hand away and trailed his fingers towards Carlos's entrance, circling it before pressing one finger through it, feeling Carlos's tight muscles clench around it as he tensed, his body going rigid.

"Relax," James told him soothingly, rubbing circles on Carlos's stomach. "I've got you. It's only me." When Carlos nodded, James could feel his muscles relax and that was when he began to move his finger in and out, Carlos's moans of pleasure making his head spin. The brunette then proceeded to add the second finger, hearing Carlos hiss at the sudden pressure.

"Keep going," Carlos told him, wanting the brunette to move. James began to move his fingers in a scissoring motion, trying to relax Carlos's muscles as he did so. It seemed to work since Carlos was thrusting his hips down onto his fingers. "I'm ready," Carlos told him, his breathing erratic. James nodded and withdrew his fingers and then went to spitting on his hand and rubbing it on his own erection, making sure it was well-coated. He lined himself with Carlos's entrance, and with one look into the Latino's eyes did he begin to push forward, the head of his shaft slipping past the tight ring of muscle before Carlos cried out softly, gripping onto James's bicep.

"Carlos?" James asked, worry building through him as he saw the Latino's eyes squeezed shut, his bottom lip trapped beneath his teeth. "Carlos, are you alright?"

"K-keep going," Carlos panted, his chest rising and falling quickly as his heart raced inside his ribcage. James nodded then began to move a bit deeper, pushing all thoughts of thrusting into the boy's tight heat to the back of his mind, for he didn't want to hurt the boy anymore than necessary. When Carlos let out another pained cry, this one louder than the last, James's heart nearly shattered as he took in the boy's appearance. His eyes were squeezed shut with tears welling in them, his breathing coming in pained sequences, his free hand clencing the bedsheets so hard his knucles were white, the other resting on Kendall's bicep, trying not to dig his nails into the other boy's arm so far as to pierce the skin.

"Oh Carlos," James said, running his hand through Carlos's hair gently. "I don't think you're ready for this."

"N-no!" Carlos pleaded, snapping his eyes open. "I-I want this! I just didn't know how much it would hurt. I want this to be with you James." He didn't know how he had someone as amazing as James, but he did. With a slow nod, James pushed his hips forward, Carlos biting his lip until James was buried at the hilt. The brunette stopped and waited for the Latino to get used to the intrusion. "Move," Carlos said so soflty that James could barely hear him, but since Carlos moved his hips in time with his words, James pulled out until the head of his length was the only thing that remained inside the Latino before he took a breath and slid forward. Carlos cried out in both pain and pleasure, his mind numbed as the pleasure quickly conquered the pain, the battle easily won. James let out a moan as he began to thrust into Carlos gently. It was when Carlos wrapped his leg around his waist and pulled him closer did James take a good look at the Latino writhing beneath him. His eyes were squeezed tight, his mouth hanging open in pleasure, his breathing labored as he moaned.

"Faster James," Carlos said. "Harder. I'm not that fragile. I'm not going to break." James chuckled breathlessly before he complied, setting a new pace. Carlos moaned, bucking his hips up to met James's well-timed thrusts. "Oh!" Carlos cried, and it was at that time that James realized that he found Carlos's sweet spot. "James!" Carlos all-but shouted, melting into the brunette's control. "H-hit there again!" James nodded, adjusting his hips so he would hit the same spot everything he moved.

"Oh Carlos," James moaned before bringing their lips together. Carlos wrapped his arms around James's neck, keeping him close as he raised his hips, meeting James's perfect.

"James! I-I'm gonna-" he was cut off as James began to pump his length, his own thrusts becoming more erratic.

"I know," he panted, his pumping in time with his thrusting. didn't know where to lean into, but he didn't need to worry about that for long since he was cut off by his release, painting both his and James's stomachs white. James groaned as he thrust one last time, releasing into Carlos. He let out a shaky breath as he gingerly pulled out of Carlos, then collapsed onto his chest. Both their bodies were coated with a thin layer of sweat, glistening in the faint light.

"You alright?" James asked, running his hand through Carlos's hair, then trailed it down to Carlos's cheek, rubbing his thumb across it softly.

"Yeah," Carlos replied softly, nuzzling into James's touch. "That was incredible." He pressed a kiss to James's lips before turning so his back was pressed against James's chest. James wrapped an arm loosely around Carlos's waist, keeping him close.

"I love you Carlos," James said, pressing a soft kiss to Carlos's neck.

"I love you too James," Carlos responded, a light smile on his face. Both soon drifted off to sleep, keeping each other close.


End file.
